You're a Real Songwriter When You Can Get Into SOMEBODY ELSE'S Head

     Introspection (noun): observation or examination of one's own mental and emotional state, mental processes, etc.; the act of looking within oneself.
     Introspection is a beautiful gift. Critics frequently praise John Lennon for his self-reflective writing. But I wonder - is there a word for being able to examine somebody else's underlying emotions? To see what they can't realize themselves? Extrospection, perhaps?
     When I was in the Purchase College Conservatory of Music, one of my favorite professors told us to stop writing, "me, me, me." "What is the other person saying or thinking?" he would ask. And in a species where interpersonal relationships - romantic or platonic - are so key to who we are, "extrospection" is critical. Write an "extrospective" song, and you might even find out more about yourself and your values than you would writing an introspective piece.

Here are some examples of my favorite "extrospective" writings:

"Can't you see that you lie to yourself?
You can't see the world through a mirror." - Avril Lavigne, "Too Much To Ask"

"Do you like the way you feel?
Nothing hurts when no one's real." - The Goo Goo Dolls, "Bullet Proof"

"So lonely inside, so busy out there
And all you wanted was somebody who cares." - Michelle Branch, "All You Wanted"

"You never could get it
Unless you were fed it
and now you're here and you don't know why" - Vertical Horizon, "Everything You Want."

"You want just a little trophy
Hanging on your arm
So all your friends can see you got it goin' on
But I see what you are so clearly" - Hoku, "Another Dumb Blonde"

All of these lyric segments contain one of the most powerful words in songwriting - You.

     When I wrote my song, "Closer", I was dead-set on writing an extrospective song. My love interest at the time was very distant, and I wanted to get into his head. I remember when I first played this song for my master class professor on an acoustic guitar, and he smiled and said, "This is your best piece yet. You just got into the mind of a man. He thinks, 'I don't want to think about caring about this girl, so I'm just going to play video games instead.'" Bingo.

"...You run away from closeness to the shelter of distractions."
"...You've been keeping your distance, but I know that it's all a front you put up."

I am so proud of this song to this day. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEzIuCYMBqE

And here's an extrospective song I just had to cover! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yUeQgsULIfU&feature=youtu.be

What are your favorite extrospective songs? Would love to hear from you!

<3 - Jill K.